


A Matter of the Heart

by hernameinthesky



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Angst, Aromantic Character, Aromantic Lydia, F/F, Friends With Benefits, Unhappy Ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-08
Updated: 2015-07-08
Packaged: 2018-04-08 07:51:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 993
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4296651
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hernameinthesky/pseuds/hernameinthesky
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“I love you.”</p><p>Lydia feels as though her insides have turned to ice. Cora suddenly feels too near, too warm, suffocating with her presence.</p><p>OR</p><p>Lydia and Cora have a friends-with-benefits arrangement. Only Cora wants to be more than friends, and Lydia really doesn't.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Matter of the Heart

**Author's Note:**

> For the prompt on tumblr "Cordia + tongue-tied (with aro!Lydia?)".
> 
> This ends on a pretty low note. I do have an idea for how to continue, and Cora and Lydia do end up together, but it’s already much longer than I intended and I have loads of prompts I need to do. So if anyone’s interested in a part 2, let me know. If not, this is it.
> 
> Warnings for heavily implied sex, and confusion about being aromantic, I guess. Lydia doesn’t exactly think there’s something wrong with her, but there’s definitely undertones of that kind of thinking.

Lydia’s nearly asleep, warm and comfortable in Cora’s bed, when Cora shifts beside her. She presses close along Lydia’s side, running her hand up her thigh and sending a shiver down her spine. Lydia can feel her breath on her neck, and she arches it expectantly, thinking she’s probably going to miss her hair appointment the next day. That doesn’t sound too bad though. She can get up late and do the crossword while Cora’s out for her run. Persuading Derek to make them pancakes will be easy, and then she can pull Cora into the shower, turning it up so it’s loud enough that they can-

“I love you.”

Lydia feels as though her insides have turned to ice. Cora suddenly feels too near, too warm, suffocating with her presence. Lydia sits up, fully awake and annoyed at that.

“What?” she says sharply, a sick, sinking feeling in her stomach as Cora’s eyes go from sleepy and content to wide and nervous.

She sits up too, pulling the sheet with her like a shield. She licks her lips, doesn’t meet Lydia eyes as she says, “I love you.” It’s even softer than the first time, and shaky in a way Lydia’s never heard from Cora, always so self-assured. It’s why she didn’t expect this, why she thought it was safe.

Of course it wasn’t safe. Nobody ever is. They all want something from her, something she can’t give. Even Cora, who she specifically made a deal with. Friends with benefits. Nothing else, ever.

And Cora had agreed; this isn’t Lydia’s fault for once. Cora had snorted like there wasn’t a chance of her developing feelings, and Lydia had believed her, like she didn’t have an IQ of 170 and nineteen years’ experience with this.

She gets out of bed and starts gathering her clothes up, pausing and looking around when Cora breathes out harshly. Her expression is shattered, like Lydia’s broken her heart or something, and _this_ , this is exactly what Lydia wanted to avoid.

“We agreed to friends with benefits,” she says, pulling up her skirt and searching around for the rest of her clothes. Cora leans off the bed and it takes a beat too long for her to sit up again, now with Lydia’s blouse clutched in her hand. When Lydia goes to take it, she sees Cora’s hands are shaking, and the pressure in her chest gets worse, like it’s going to crush her ribcage.

“I’m sorry,” she says, sounding a little lost, a little shattered herself.

Cora blinks up at her for a moment, then shakes her head sharply, face closing off. “It’s fine. It’s like you said, we agreed to friends with benefits. Nothing else.” She tries for a smirk, and it just looks sad. “Besides, it’d be way too cliché for the Big Bad Wolf to fall for Little Red.”

Her attempt at a joke is even sadder than her smile, but Lydia laughs anyway, the sound grating in the quiet room.

“We can-” Cora hesitates, her cheeks flushing red but her eyes determined. “This doesn’t have to change anything. I can keep my feelings in check. I wouldn’t have even said anything if I didn’t think you felt the same.”

“Why did you?” Lydia can’t help asking, can’t help hoping for a specific answer so she can avoid doing whatever it is next time.

Cora’s jaw tightens. “Why do you think? We spend nearly all our time together, Lydia. You’re over here nearly every night when you’re not with Allison, you help me with math, you tease my brother. Even Derek says you practically live here.”

And Lydia… Lydia’s mystified. Because all that makes no sense. She does the exact same things with Allison. She says as much to Cora, who frowns.

“But you don’t have sex with Allison.”

Lydia runs a hand through her hair, trying to tamp down her frustration, remind herself that this time it’s her who doesn’t understand, who’s different. “Sex is just sex, Cora,” she says. “It’s fun, and you’re good at it, but the other stuff… that’s just friendship. Don’t you have any other friends?”

Cora gapes at her for a moment, eyes flashing angrily. “Yes, I have friends! But my friends don’t-” She stops. Then she lets out a shaky laugh. Closes her eyes and presses her lips together like she’s trying to hold in a sob. “Never mind,” she says quietly, not opening her eyes. “You’re right; you’ve never been romantic with me. I was just… pushing my emotions onto you, I guess.”

Lydia doesn’t know what to say to that. Doesn’t know if Cora’s lying so she’ll leave, or if she really does realise she’s made a mistake.

“I didn’t mean to lead you on,” she says finally. “It didn’t occur to me that you- that you might-”

“Really?”

Lydia glares at Cora’s surprise. “Obviously not, or I wouldn’t have done it. How was I supposed to know?”

Cora raises her eyebrows disbelievingly. “It’s sort of obvious, Lydia,” she says. “I buy you flowers every week, I make you breakfast in bed. Lydia, I told you about my family. I showed you our photo album.”

And all that’s true, and Lydia should have known, but she never knows.

“I thought… You’re one of my best friends, Cora, but I don’t… I didn’t realise…”

She closes her eyes, reaching harder for the words than she normally does and still coming up empty. She doesn’t know how to explain it, not without making herself sound heartless and unfeeling. Which she isn’t. She loves Cora, she does, but not any more than she loves Allison or Kira.

“I don’t do relationships,” she says eventually, slipping on her shoes, thankful she can finally leave.

Cora flops back on the bed and rubs her hands over her face. “This isn’t going to make things weird, is it?” she says.

“No,” Lydia says firmly. “Of course not. I’ll see you tomorrow.”


End file.
